Reflection for the Week of 22-May-2022

As a mother of a school-aged child, the mass shooting at a Texas school earlier this week impacted me. I felt a mixture of grief, anger, and helplessness. Like other parents, I dropped off my child at school the next day, holding them tight as we hugged goodbye before the school day. It’s devastating to consider the victim’s families said goodbye to their loved ones the morning before without knowing it would be their last.

On a nursing community page, fellow nurses asked what they could do to support the healthcare workers caring for the mass shooting victims. I’m a neonatal and pediatric nurse and always find it difficult to see children suffering in a hospital due to the brutality or neglect of adults. It’s inevitable to encounter child abuse cases in my line of work, but dealing with the mass murder of children is unfathomable. I became emotional as I imagined trying to care for the victims and facing so many deaths at once.

I’m so tired of mourning, crying, and feeling helpless. I pray but cannot accept that it’s now the responsibility of parents to search for bullet-proof backpacks or for kids to know where to hide or how to play dead to protect themselves from an active shooter. We have to do better for our children. We need to act and demand action from our leaders.

I have always believed that one cannot complain about issues if you’re unwilling to do something about them or propose solutions. One way to start taking action is to consider donating to Everytown for Gun Safety at everytown.org. I have contributed to the organization based on the guidance of other mothers and family members I trust. Other mothers I know have chosen to participate in their Moms Demand Action groups; I hope to join them.

Have a peaceful week – and if you are not at peace, may your internal discord inspire you to act and make positive life-giving changes. Take care and good luck on your journey.

Mother’s Day in the NICU

Mother’s Day coincided with my 3rd consecutive day working in the hospital. I get pretty exhausted after three-in-a-row shifts, even working on dayshift. Knowing how tired I get, my husband thoughtfully ordered food for us to have dinner at home last night. After dinner, I finally opened my daughter’s Mother’s Day card/gift she made at her school. (She’s been eager to have me open it since she brought it home on Friday – I insisted on waiting until Mother’s Day)

A portrait – part of my daughter’s Mother’s Day gift

My shift was hectic yesterday, but I didn’t mind working on Mother’s Day in the NICU. For our babies who have parents that visit them, I get to be there to comfort and support the parents and to celebrate the mothers on their special day. Some parents have difficulty being separated from their babies while their babies heal or recover in the NICU, especially on days like Mothers Day. NICU nurses often provide emotional support and assurance for patients’ caregivers. Some parents don’t yet feel comfortable handling or caring for their babies. As nurses, we educate and guide caregivers in their new roles.

All the NICU nurses made Mother’s Day cards using our babies’ various handprints or footprints on Saturday. I don’t usually have much downtime to craft cards for parents, but I enjoyed making memorable print keepsakes for our patients and their caregivers. Some of our babies have no parents visiting them and are awaiting placement in foster care or adoption. We still made Mother’s Day cards for them – their future families may appreciate their teeny baby prints!

Until this past weekend, I’d never seen these cards or prints on our unit. At my children’s hospital preceptorship in nursing school, I often saw footprint cards made by nurses in the NICU. However, those patients were at higher acuity, so 1) had longer stays and 2) had 1:1 nurse-to-patient ratios. Still, I want to try making more of these cards for our NICU babies in the future. It’s a great souvenir for caregivers, and it allows me to practice my beginner calligraphy skills!

Since I worked on Mother’s Day, my family decided to celebrate Mother’s Day with my parents on Tuesday, May 10, when my Mexican friends celebrate Mother’s Day / Dia de la Madre. (Cultural Awareness Tip: El Salvador and Guatemala also celebrate their Mother’s Day on May 10). We have many patients from immigrant families at work, so I told some nurses to keep displaying their Mother’s Day cards/signs until Tuesday.

Wherever or whenever you happen to celebrate it, I hope you have (or had) a “Happy Mother’s Day”!